You Might Be A Redneck If:

Rednecks are easy to make fun of because they are so different then anything else in the world.

He is their poster boy!

-None of your shirts cover your stomach.
-You consider a six-pack and a bug-zapper high-quality entertainment.
-You judge drive time solely by the number of beers you need to take.
-You think loading the dishwasher means getting your wife drunk.
-You believe dual air bags refer to your wife and mother-in-law.
-Your wife's hairdo was once ruined by a ceiling fan.

-You lit a match in the bathroom and your house exploded right off it's wheels.
-You go to your family reunion looking for a date.
-You own a homemade fur coat.
-The bluebook value of your truck goes up and down, depending on how much gas it has in it.
-You think the stock market has a fence around it.
-You carried a fishing pole into Sea World.
-You have the local taxidermist's number on speed dial.
-You take a load to the dump and bring back more than you took.
-You've been married three times and still have the same in-laws.
-You wonder how service stations keep their rest rooms so clean.
-Your toilet paper has page numbers on it.
-Your Junior/Senior Prom had a Daycare.

I feel bad for the dog... 

-You think genitalia is an Italian airline.
-You can change the oil in your truck without ducking your head.
-You think taking a bubble bath starts with eating beans for dinner.
-Your stereo speakers used to belong to the Moonlight Drive-in Theater.
-You have to go outside to get something out of the fridge.
-The Salvation Army declines your mattress.
-Your father executes the "pull my finger" trick during Christmas dinner.
-The Halloween pumpkin on your front porch has more teeth than your wife.